Relationship, not just sex?
Dear Alice, I've had a great time at college, but all my relationships have been based on one thing Sometimes it is all that I want, but sometimes it is all that she wants.
Any suggestions on how to find a "nice girl," just to have a good honest relationship with?
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I'm a model so I don't have problems meeting girls, just keeping them! I am also a very nice person, concerned with nature and I could never hurt a person's feelings if I tried.
This leads to problems, however, because it is hard for me to "make my move" for fear of upsetting the girl. I have never been turned down for a first date — plenty of second dates though, but only because I make sure before the first date, through a friend, that there is an interest.
If any of this makes any sense, give me a write! Nice, It sounds as though you're ready to have a relationship that goes beyond the sexual realm. What people want out of relationships may change over the course of their life.
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So, what can you do? Read on to learn more. Before asking someone out, you may find it helpful to consider what characteristics you want in a partner — you might even create a list. You may not be able to find someone who fulfills all of those qualities, and that's okay.
Doing this will help you think through what characteristics and values you desire in a romantic partner. For example, you say you're looking for someone who is nice and that you're nice as well.
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What are other traits that you'd like in a partner? Are you looking for someone thoughtful?
Focus on the positive, non-physical attributes. Why do nice guys always finish last?
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Just a quick question: I've tried being nice all my life nineteen years to women, yet I get nothing. Yet if some guy who treats them really badly comes in, they're the ones who end up with a girlfriend — and me with squat.
These studies have somewhat demonstrated that niceness is valued differently for heterosexual men versus women Note: And though research may provide some additional insight more on that in a bitit also bears mentioning that being true to you — nice-ness and all — will likely still be what pays off in the long-run in the romance department.
On the contrary, women studied showed a more mixed, or neutral response to men they perceived as nice.
Are these valid reasons? Might there be some more complicated forces at play both in the general population, and also in your specific case?
It may be worth reviewing the theories of partner selection briefly before addressing your questions: Evolutionary theories look at what women and men would theoretically do if the main goal of partner selection was to perpetuate the species in other words, to make babies.
These theories claim that for men a central driver is attractiveness: